WELCOME

President George Weir welcomed all to the December 28^th meeting of the Brattleboro Rotary Club held at the American Legion in Brattleboro. Phil George offered the following meaningful invocation:

“A new year is unfolding — like a blossom with pedals curled tightly concealing the beauty within.

Lord, let this year be filled with things that are truly good — with the comfort of warmth in our relationships,
with the strength to help those who need our help and the humility and openness to accept help from others.

As we make our resolutions for the New Year ahead, let us go forward with the great hope
that all things can be possible — with Your help and guidance.”

This was followed by the pledge of allegiance.

As a luncheon of pork loin, chicken, mac & cheese, carrots, mashed potatoes, salad, and chocolate chip cookies for dessert was being digested, the meeting continued.

Guests: Ben Jerome Lee and Hallie Flower (speaker)

TRIVIA QUESTION

Who wrote “Auld Lang Syne”?

(answer below)

JOKE OF THE WEEK

For our Rotary joke, Marty Cohn told a version of the following joke:

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Tennessee. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence to collect the bird, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.

The lawyer replied, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field. Now I'm going in to retrieve it."

The old farmer looked the lawyer in the eyes and stated firmly, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The lawyer huffed angrily, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the country. If you don't let me get my duck, I'll sue you."

The old farmer smiled. "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Tennessee. We settle small disagreements like this with the Tennessee Three Kick Rule."

The lawyer asked, "What's the Tennessee Three Kick Rule?"

The Farmer answered, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."

The attorney thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the lawyer. His first kick to the shin had the lawyer hopping around on one foot when suddenly the farmer planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. The attorney was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to pass out.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old coot, now it's my turn."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck.

ROTARY MINUTE

For our Rotary minute, Ron Stahley told us that, realizing that getting children into schools isn't enough to solve illiteracy, Rotary shifts to mentoring and coaching teachers. To learn more, click here.

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At our January 4th meeting, TBA will tell a joke or lead us in song, while TBA delivers a Rotary Minute.

NOTE: Weekly assignments are posted on club website.

UPCOMING PROGRAMS

· 01/04 – Dart Everett presents: Dollars for Duds
· 01/11– Marty Cohn presents: Chloe Learey “Early Childhood Educations Means Economic Development”
· 01/18– Club Assembly
· 01/25 – Marty Cohn presents: Greg Sukiennik, Brattleboro Reformer

· 02/01 – Betsy Gentile presents: TBA

· 02/08 – Phil George presents: 99 Restaurant

NOTE: 2017-18 Weekly assignments (program, joke, and Rotary minute) are posted on club’s website.

FINES

George Anthes was fined for not knowing the words to "White Christmas" after challenging the club to sing along.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

We're planning a fun fundraiser for our January 4th meeting. Bring your unwanted presents and your checkbook and we'll auction them off! Wait - we won't auction your checkbook, unless you're feeling super generous! The idea is, one Rotarian's "dud" is another Rotarian's treasure. Don't stop with those gifts you don't like. Look around the house for other things in good condition that you just don't need anymore. And, bring cash or your checkbook. You'll be buying treasures! All money raised in this crazy endeavor will go to “Feed the Thousands.”

BRAGS

Dart Everett– for not finding "Jewish Christmas Songs" on Google.

Cindy Jerome – for her son Ben’s academic achievements.

George Weir – for Rhonda Calhoun knowing exactly where to find puff pastry in Hannaford.

George Anthes – for Irving Berlin writing “White Christmas”

Milt Eaton – for 2017.

Cyndi Ferrante – for her son Gabe being selected to be a resident assistant.

Liz Harrison– for her son’s flight from Scotland to Hartford.

PROGRAM:

Milt Eaton presented Hallie Flower, executive director of New England Youth Theatre.

REMINDERS

Bottles and cans can be brought to Putney Road redemption center to benefit Pure Water for the World. Please see Mara Williams.

“Like” the club’s Facebook page.

If you like this newsletter, brag at next Club meeting. So far only FIVE members have acknowledged this rag.

To view the episode 3 of Rotary Cares, click here.

To listen to episode 3 of Rotary Cares podcast, click here.

This bulletin was respectfully submitted by Past President Martin Cohn who attempts to give a gist of the meeting. However, it is always better to attend. If you have any complaints about the contents of this bulletin....

ANSWER TO TRIVIA QUESTION

"Auld Lang Syne" is a Scottish poem written by Robert Burns in 1788 and set to the tune of a traditional folk song.

For more info, click here.